December 3, 2022

Did you ever think about the fact that Jesus was neither a Sadducee, nor a Pharisee, nor a scribe?  He had been anointed by the very Spirit (Lk 3:22) – seemingly in private (v.21) – and lived out the deep feeling of being called by name by the living God without the trappings of institutional life (Lk 4:18).  Are we comfortable with our identity at this level?  Do we hold onto the illusion of power because we are insecure?  Do titles and rankings and outfits facilitate or obstruct our purpose in the world?  The next time we go to pronounce a judgment or pontificate, let’s pause, and, like Jesus, listen for that same Spirit.  We shall be led on paths we do not understand (Is 55:8-9), and perhaps mocked for not having official credentials (Jn 1:46), but we shall nevertheless live authentically and invite those who are lost in the world of religious symbolism to encounter the reality which they so ardently seek.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica

November 26, 2022

The word “abomination” is a serious biblical term that sometimes gets thrown around carelessly in public religious discourse.  It might be best translated as “horrifying” or “disgusting” and is most often aimed at same-sex-attracted people (cf. Lev 18:22).  Nevertheless, a more rigorous exploration of the scriptural text reveals that there were lots of abominations in the ancient Jewish mind: eating shellfish (Lev 11:12), shaving (Lev 19:27), and getting a tattoo (Lev 19:28) to name a few.  In one way or another, each of these activities jeopardized the growth of the fledgling covenant community whose sole purpose was to establish a nation that could survive in adverse geopolitical conditions.  As the story of salvation has unfolded, however, the dignity of each person (Gen 1:26), beyond national identity or ethnic purity, has emerged as the focal point of authentic human living.  It has thus become increasingly clear that the real abomination is a heart that is “fat and gross” (Ps 119:70), when we choose pietism over communion with our sisters and brothers  (Lk 10:31-32), or any other behavior that keeps us from our deepest identity as children of the living God (1 Jn 4:19).  Let’s, therefore, have the courage to relinquish the moralism that has us obsessing about “specks” when there is a “beam” obstructing our own vision of things (Mt 7:3).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

November 19, 2022

Repression is such a pitfall!  This desire scares me so I’ll push it back down.  This memory haunts me so I’ll just avoid it.  This emotion is painful so I’ll pretend it’s not there.  How long can this go on?  How much energy will we spend fighting against ourselves?  How does one live like that?!  The juxtaposition of the lost son with his repressed brother (Lk 15:11-32) says it all:  yes, living by the spirit may cause us to go astray for a period of time, but the alternative is a self-imposed prison that keeps us stuck for life.  Our willingness to feel our feelings and be vulnerable to the spirit – as messy as that may seem – is sufficient.  The living God will rejoice in our openness and draw us down paths that will align us and allow us to be integrated.  The next time, therefore, we are tempted to prove our “holiness” by tamping down our longing for life, let’s remember that Jesus specifically identifies prostitutes – not the self-controlled religious leaders – as the ones entering the kingdom (Mt 21:31).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

November 12, 2022

Do you stand outside the fire?  It is an obvious place to be, especially if we have been through the painful experience of getting burned in the past, but it is not a long-term vision for human living.  I think of the angel with the fiery sword placed at the entrance to Eden (Gen 3:24), a purifying force that we must have the courage to eventually pass through as we, lost to sin, make the journey back to our inner gardens.  I think of Moses, a man who was scarred by the red-hot identity issues of his day, but who nevertheless returned to his raging homeland after the flaming bush taught him how to “burn without being consumed” (Ex 3:2).  I think of Christ crucified, his life “consummated” at the moment of death (Jn 19:30), sending down literal bursts of fire from beyond to remind us of our spiritual destinies (Act 2:3).  Let’s therefore not be contented with a lukewarm life on the outside (Mk 14:54), but instead have enough faith to enter into the “fiery furnace” of our present circumstances (Dan 3:19-30).  Having been transformed by this trial, we, alongside Jesus, shall “set the world on fire” (Lk 12:49) with a blazing love that “cannot be quenched” (Song 8:7).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

November 5, 2022

We think our first kiss will be awkward and stress out about how to pucker our lips, what to do with hands, or whether to close our eyes, but in the moment we discover that we are built for such an encounter all the way down to the subatomic level of our being.  Indeed, everything that is was kissed into existence by the mouth of our loving God who spoke and brought forth all of life (Gen 1:1-31) in a big-bang kind of kiss.  We human beings have the special honor of coming into consciousness with those divine lips still fresh on our faces, as we received the breath of life (Gen 2:7) from the one who constantly makes all things new (Rev 21:5).  It should thus be no surprise that one of the most commented on verses of the Bible is “let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth” (Song 1:2), and it is fitting that Jesus was betrayed with a kiss from a person who was spiritually confused.  The next time we find ourselves in a kissing situation, let’s rejoice in our shared capacity for connection.  May every word that escapes my mouth be a kiss that anoints others with the good news, and may every movement of my heart be an act of worship of the one who kissed me first (1 Jn 4:19).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica

October 29, 2022

Imagine, if you will, Jesus waking up in the middle of the night, in a cold sweat, because he had just had a nightmare.  Imagine Jesus, shovel in hand, walking out to a nearby field, digging a hole, squatting and going to the bathroom.  Imagine Jesus getting a whiff of the perfume of a local beauty as they pass one another in the center of town.  Imagine Jesus alone, hurt and confused because he overheard a friend talking badly about him.  Imagine Jesus too tired to finish a journey and needing to make it a two-day trip.  Imagine Jesus getting second place as he raced other boys when he was a kid.  Imagine Jesus not hungry for what his mom cooked for dinner.  Imagine Jesus having a hard time falling asleep at night.  Imagine Jesus talking to his dad about sexual reproduction.  Imagine Jesus home from work fighting off a cold.  Imagine Jesus limping around the kitchen after accidentally jamming his toe into the table.  Imagine Jesus craving something sweet after dinner.  Imagine Jesus trying to stay composed as he fields complaints from a customer about some piece of furniture he had hand-crafted.  The more comfortable we are imagining Jesus in these scenarios, the more we will be able to accept that we too are children of the living God who brought us into existence and loves us just the way we are.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

October 22, 2022

We human beings are “need machines.”  While there is some truth to the hierarchy of needs – starting with food and shelter moving all the way up to self-actualization and purpose – our existential need is so much more profound.  Indeed, we need to be conceived in the mind of our maker, we need to be brought into history and time, we need to be born, we need to be situated in a culture, we need to be sustained, and we constantly need that next breath.  The image of the crucified Christ is an icon of authentic human need.  Vulnerable yet trusting, he exclaimed, “I thirst” (Jn 19:28), as if to say that when everything else is taken away, it is “need” that remains.  If we are not in touch with this core and vital exigence in ourselves, perhaps it is time to do some soul-searching:  Are we sitting on a cushion of false-security?  Has an accumulation of money prevented us from needing the living God?  Have we grown complacent after reaching our so-called goals in life?  Are we under the delusion that we have power and control?  Whatever the case may be, taking a risk on need will ground us, humanize us and help us to become ourselves, and any anxiety we have about our hierarchy of needs will give way to the sheer excitement of resurrected life. Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

October 15, 2022

I used to work with a guy who had a sign on the wall of his office that said, “Be Human.”  What was interesting to me is that the sign was posted in the spot where there had been a crucifix.  I initially wondered if it was some kind of political or ideological statement, but the more I pondered the sign, the more I came to understand how profound it really was:  Jesus, vulnerable, literally nude upon the cross, misunderstood and beaten up, yet perfectly at peace and trusting that all things do in fact work together unto good (Rom 8:28), is what my life looks like at its best.  It is therefore no coincidence that Jesus was crucified on the day before the Sabbath, the sixth day of the week, as if to symbolize the re-creation of human beings who were created on the sixth day (Gen 1:26-31).  At the moment of his death, Jesus exclaimed, “It is finished” (Jn 19:26), as if to signify that our human nature is not a finished product until it has been marked by the bold risk of surrender that is death.  The next time we are tempted to blurt out the phrase, “I’m only human,” after we stumble in life, let’s pause, look within, and remember that, by our humanity, we have been “crowned with glory and honor” (Ps 8:5) and that it actually takes a lifetime to “Be Human.”  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

October 8, 2022

Is Attention Deficit Disorder really a fair way to label a person?  While many children are scolded for not paying enough attention in school or medicated so that they can be like the others, we seldom consider why their focus is withheld in the first place.  Could it be because the lessons are boring?  Or because the personalities are not engaging?  Or because the conversations are not interesting?  Or because the conclusions lack depth?  Indeed, if we allowed these prophets to speak – instead of scapegoating them in order to maintain the status quo – we would stand to learn much about the beauty and complexity of life beyond our comfortable societal parameters.  Perhaps Jesus, who set out on a meandering journey from his hometown to Jerusalem – absorbed in a combination of preaching, teaching and healing all along the way – would be the poster-child for ADD today.  Nevertheless, it is precisely his unwillingness to adhere to a legalistic system that privileged conformity to the law above all else that enabled him to reveal the mystery of it all.  Let’s therefore demand meaning and wonder in our human experience.  Let’s allow our senses to be filled with people, places and things that capture the imagination and remind us of life’s essential goodness.  Let’s make poetry, play and dance our way into eternity.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

“Pied Beauty” by Gerard Manley Hopkins

October 1, 2022 🌹

Consolations can be a stumbling block in the spiritual life:  things just keep working out my way, look how blessed I am, the fortunes are raining down, this special rosary of mine, these sweet feelings, but when the winds of life change – and they will – what is underneath?  Indeed, while the living God has a thousand little ways of getting us excited about our human journeys and nudging us toward the infinite, there is no substitute for that glorious risk and act of faith that actually gets us to step out into the unknown (Mt 14:22-33).  Our heavenly mother is constantly engineering opportunities for us to take flight.  Initially, we may feel comfortable in the consolation nest and indifferent to any other version of life.  Nevertheless, we will get to the point where either interior dissatisfaction or external circumstances will demand a decision of us, and when the time is right – oh how patient she is! – we will spread our wings and we will fly (Is 40:31).  She will thus become the wind beneath our wings and, as such, the one true consolation that lasts.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

September 24, 2022

What’s the relationship between your “I” and “me”?  When our souls are confused, we end up in that classic inward-caving-of-the-self situation where our desires are constantly directed back toward the psychological projector screen.  This life of shadows amounts to desperately grasping after things that we think we need paired with the inevitable anguish when those things fail to satisfy.  This closed-off system is a recipe for a suffocating human experience.  The Christian life is an invitation to put the “I” and the “me” back in right relationship.  Indeed, when we die to self, the system is broken open and that fear-based clinging is transformed into a partnership where the “I” thinks critically, understands and knows, while the “me” feels deeply, longs for and receives.  Starting tonight, do this:  Instead of vegging out in front of the television for an hour, which simply supports the status quo, go to a quiet place (Mt 6:6) and let the “I” and “me” mess begin the untangling process.  Beyond the intensity of the interior jungle, we will discover a mind that is starving for reality and a heart that thirsts for the truth (cf. Mt 25:35).  These two sides of the same coin (cf. Lk 10:35) are together the essence of our spiritual health which will allow us to say things like “I love you” and “Please help me” in a way that reveals the glory of our shared humanity.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica

September 17, 2022

Have you drunk the Kool-Aid?  This provocative question is of course a reference to a tragic event that resulted in a significant loss of life, but it is nevertheless an invitation for each of us to be honest about what motivates us in our depths.  While we may consider ourselves to be squeaky-clean independent thinkers who would never adopt someone else’s agenda, we should consider the subtle way that indoctrination actually happens.  Indeed, just as Jesus indicated in his public teachings (Mt 13:24-30), the Kool-Aid more typically comes to us and if we are not intentional about guarding the door of our minds and hearts, we will unknowingly consume it:  all of a sudden we are wearing fancy clothing, paying attention to the latest trends, getting obsessive about our weight, worrying about our financial standing, and desperately trying to keep up appearances.  Perhaps we do not practice vigilance (Mt 26:40) because we are afraid of intimacy, unwilling to experience life without interference from the outside.  Whatever the case may be, when we become aware of our hidden cravings and learn how to be nourished from the inside (Rev 3:20), we shall deal eucharistically with the Kool-Aid (Mt 26:26), inviting would-be enemies and manipulators into the spiritual communion that they are actually seeking.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica

September 10, 2022

When we were growing up, my brother and I were outstanding backyard football players.  We could throw the deep ball, kick field goals, run through any defense, return punts, block linemen, and tackle anybody who came our way.  Yet, when we entered high school and tried to play football with twenty pounds of equipment on our one hundred pound bodies, we lost both our agility and our passion for the game.  I wonder if this is an analogy for our spiritual lives, that is, when we are young and carefree our relationship with God is so natural,  but as we grow older and get weighed down by religious, intellectual and emotional baggage, we find it increasingly difficult to operate as spiritual people.  Perhaps we have forgotten what it is like to live by the Spirit and have settled for lukewarmness, or maybe we’re just stuck with no end in sight.  Whatever the case may be, we will always have the choice, like Jesus, to put out our hands and be led to new places (Jn 21:18), and it is this willingness to walk in the direction of the living God, into open spaces (Ps 119:45) and new horizons, that allows our burdens to be scraped away and our hearts realigned to the truth of things.  My brother and I eventually found the soccer and rugby pitches – what new fields are awaiting you (Mt 13:44)?  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

September 3, 2022

A famous playwright once observed that “all the world’s a stage” and we are “merely players.”  If you have ever worked for a corporation, taught in a school, held public office, or been a member of a family, you understand exactly what he meant, namely, that unwritten rules cause much of our lives to feel like a show.  Such assumptions include: profit is the most important thing, kids just naturally misbehave, image is everything, we’re better than other families, etc.  While our first instinct when we become aware of the fakeness of it all might be cynicism (Ecc 1:1), we should be careful not to throw the baby out with the bathwater.  Indeed, the complex web that constitutes society and culture is a necessary apparatus for the Kingdom of God to be realized and for us to enter into our full human potential.  To live in a state of renunciation and isolation serves no one!  The key is to practice humility, to go low and to live as authentic persons in the midst of the drama, actors whose script is the one written on the human heart from the beginning of time (Rom 2:15).  May these various venues, therefore, become liturgical spaces where we are constantly re-presenting the Christic pattern until all people are gathered onto that one true stage which no longer imitates but confers life (Rev 19:1-10). Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

August 27, 2022

Chew on this cud:  A cow only eats grass yet becomes a nourishing and protein-packed feast for others.  This is a great analogy for the spiritual life.  Indeed, while it can be easy to develop a sensationalized spirituality that is constantly on the lookout for fireworks and ticker-tape parades, it is the simplicity of prayer, quiet time spent with the Father, and attentiveness to our most inward longings that actually makes our lives fruitful and capable of sustaining others on their own journeys of faith.  This is definitely the story of Jesus, the “slain lamb” (Rev 5:6), whose hidden life in Nazareth eventually gave way to Jerusalem where eucharisitc nourishment flowed from his side and has been feeding people across cultures and time periods ever since.  Why not, therefore, experiment for a year?  One hour every night, or first thing in the morning.  Uninterrupted time with our heavenly Father, renewing our inward spirit, being fed with grace on the inside so that our personalities, our thoughts, our intentions, our work, our words, and our very lives might become prime rib for starving souls on the outside.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.


August 20, 2022

Intentionality replaces sentimentality in a mature adult faith.  When we are young, our religious imaginations tend to be caught up in the heroic stories of saints, our hearts in the fervor of devotion, our minds in the beauty of ecclesiastical logic, and our senses in the rich symbolism of the liturgy.  As time goes on, however, our souls grow wary of being caught up in anything at all and long instead to stand on something that lasts.  To be intentional is a decision, a firm act of the will that draws us out of our comfort zones into the deep (Lk 5:4) where the one whom our hearts love (Song 3:3) actually dwells.  Perhaps this is the essence of Jesus’ entire ministry, that is, taking a risk on his heavenly Father as he encountered the poor and proclaimed the truth over the predictable rubrics and emotional highs of temple worship (Mt 12:6-7).  Perhaps we ourselves need to be honest about our affinity for all the fanfare, outward appearances and spiritual consolations.  Whatever the case may be, wallowing in sweet religious feelings is not enough.  We must cultivate a deep intentionality which at some point will allow us to get up from the tax table (Mt 9:9), extend our hands in trust (Jn 21:18), and follow wherever he leads us (Jn 8:12). Ave Crux, Spes Unica. 

August 13, 2022

“We Shall Overcome” is a famous song that just seems to touch the hearts of all people no matter the culture.  It has been used in many political contexts, but always in a way that links the heaviness of the world’s demands with the hopefulness implicit in human nature.  The song offers a constructive way to deal with the natural tension of living as individuals in society, and thus invites us to celebrate the paradox of a weight that is powerless to crush us when we confront it with our vulnerability.  The image of Jesus before Pilate comes to mind:  the full force of the Roman Empire juxtaposed with a single man, bound and beaten, who does not say a word (Mt 27:14).  One can almost hear “We Shall Overcome” playing in the background, as Pilate, standing in amazement (Mt 27:14), dumbfoundedly asks himself, “What is truth?” (Jn 18:38).  The next time, therefore, a colleague takes aim at us, a family member slights us, someone cuts us off in traffic, or we simply feel the pressure mounting with each peek at our phone screen, we can choose to be like Jesus by standing tall and holding the line.  With our faces set like flint against stone (Is 50:7), we will in fact be in the constant mode of overcoming any obstacle that prevents us from realizing our deep dignity as children of the living God.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

August 6, 2022

It is not entirely clear why subatomic particles behave the way they do, but they tend to gravitate toward one another, share space together, and interact in unexpected but profound ways.  This so-called “entanglement,” however, collapses when one tries to measure it, perhaps a defense mechanism which helps to preserve the intimacy and dignity of the particular particle relationship.  It seems to me that this is the meaning of the resurrected Christ:  Jesus is capable of being entangled with all sorts of different people – breakfast on the beach (Jn 21:1-13), breaking bread with two strangers (Lk 24:13-35), passing through a locked door (Jn 20:19-29), a great commision from the mountain top (Mt 28:16-20) – but he escapes containment.  In fact, he literally tells Mary Magdalene, “Do not hold on to me!” (Jn 20:17), as if to say that true communion with our heavenly Father and all of creation falls apart the moment it gets captured and becomes a spectacle.  Let’s therefore follow Jesus into a world of cosmic entanglement by dying to the fear-based clinginess that keeps our spiritual lives pinned to old and unenlightened laws of physics.  Indeed, we shall one day be caught up in the clouds with him (1 Thes 4:17) in a relationship that needs no validation other than the immeasurable dignity we possess together as children of the living God.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

July 30, 2022

Has anyone ever accused you of having a Messiah complex?  It might have been intended as a criticism – unnecessary interventions, over-involvement in other people’s affairs, or doing for somebody what they could do for themselves – but the real damning statement would be to say that you lack a Messiah-complex.  Indeed, the drama and anguish of a life that cares about other people, however imperfectly, is infinitely better than a lukewarm heart, for the only thing to come out of indifference is death to the human soul.  We must therefore learn to be like Jesus, who found appropriate ways to befriend his adversaries (Jn 3:1-21), uplift the oppressed (e.g. Lk 17:11-19), speak truth to the powerful (Jn 18:28-40), and even offer consolation to his persecutors (Lk 23:24).  If we join Jesus on that slow and intentional journey to Jerusalem, filled with many prayerful nights of trying to sort things out on the mountaintop, the barnacles will be scraped from our personalities and our otherwise disordered need to interfere, fix and control will give way to some new and life-giving way of being.  We will thus become co-redeemers with Christ (Col 1:24), forming together a single Messiah capable of bringing healing to a broken world and renewing the face of the earth.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

July 23, 2022

“Little things with great love.”  This was the spiritual mantra of the Little Flower, adopted by a certain mother of the poorest of the poor, which makes the bold claim that the all is contained in each individual thing.  How easy it is to constantly stay at the level of the big picture, mentally moving around concepts about strategic planning, obsessing about how to successfully rebrand our organization, crunching numbers and data to improve our financial footing, all the while forgetting the texture and concreteness of life at an ants-eye level.  To do little things with great love is, in some ways, a humble admission that our limited minds could never really figure things out, but that we can get glimpses of the meaning of it all by living creaturely, with our boots on the ground, embracing the simple daily realities offered to us within our modest slice of the big picture.  Let’s therefore take a lesson from the disciples who, having sequestered themselves in the literal “upper room,” surrendered their need for perfect understanding and allowed their feet to touch the earth (Acts 2:41-42).  In this way, we shall become sacramental, like the Little Flower, spending our days doing little things with great love exactly where we stand, celebrating the beauty and goodness of life in the details.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica

July 16, 2022

Have you ever seen the image of Jesus in an icon?  He is definitely staring at you, but he also has these inner eyes that are looking somewhere deep.  The result is the feeling of being drawn in, invited into something going on inside of him.  Jesus’ interior life has something to do with the one whom his heart loves (Song 3:3): a gazing upon his beloved, a constant act of trust, a deep and abiding feeling of peace.  Even though the old warning to maintain “custody of the eyes” seems like old-fashioned advice in our modern times, there really is something to being disciplined about where we look.  Indeed, if we, through our eyes, are giving ourselves away to the various alluring objects in our surroundings or on our phone screens, we forfeit the inner intimacy that we are actually desperate to find.  Let’s therefore have the humility to use our eyelids as natural shields that guard our souls.  Let’s get into the habit of sitting quietly in a chair in the morning or evening, with our eyes closed, looking inward, remembering what it is like to be with the beloved.  Let’s, like Jesus, become people who learn to love others by simply looking at them (Mk 10:21).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

July 9, 2022

“The Power of Now” is the title of a trendy book on spirituality that has captured the imagination of a popular audience.  It speaks to the average modern person who lives a screen-to-face kind of life and who is thus bombarded with psychological stimuli almost every moment of the day.  In this highly addictive situation, all time collapses as one is left with a bowl of images, ideas and emotions that just get pushed around ceaselessly in the mind.  What if, however, we shifted the focus from mind to heart?  What if we directed our attention to some deep place in the soul?  What if we found a still point around which the rest of our lives could be structured?  This is the power of “now,” and it is above all else an act of trust in the invisible one who simply is (Ex 3:14, Jn 8:58) and who invites us to be with him (Jn 15:4).  Therefore, the next time we catch ourselves obsessing about the future or living in the past, let’s return to the “now.”  All it takes is a deep breath, an act of intentionality, or looking down at our feet to recall where we are.  In this way, we shall realize that the hour is constantly upon us (Jn 12:22) and discover that a life rooted in the present moment has time for absolutely everything (Ecc 3:1-8).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

July 2, 2022

“Holding life with an open hand” is the most memorable line that I have ever heard in a homily.  It awakened something deep in me, the desire to trust, to be vulnerable and to choose a posture of receptivity despite being in a world that is full of dangers.  How easy it is indeed to say no, to shut down, to withdraw, to hide, to jockey for position, to manipulate outcomes, in a word, to try to be in control.  That’s all fear-based stuff, a clenched fist that becomes sore and does not lead to life.  We can, however, practice living with an open hand by literally extending one of our hands outward…gradually releasing it to an open position…then breathing….again….and again….and again….gazing upon the mystery….of a power….that is made perfect….in weakness (cf. 2 Cor 12:9).  What if we learned how to navigate the contours of family life, the workplace, political and religious spheres like that?  We would probably feel peace in our guts and start believing that existence really is coherent and that ours is simply to cooperate.  Let’s therefore go back to the garden and, with our praying Lord (Mt 26:39), overcome that grabbing instinct (Gen 3:6), by making the firm decision for hands and hearts and feet and ears and minds and bodies and souls that are constantly open to the gift of life.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.  

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June 25, 2022

Self-image can be very confusing terrain to navigate.  Lodged deeply in our psyches is that principal idea of who we think we are, but who knows how such an image gets planted there in the first place and to what degree it is even truthful.  Thus we all experience the need to escape into one addiction or another to cope with the impossible standard of the idol that has been constructed in our minds.  What if instead of being slaves to this vicious cycle, however, we became serious about our life of prayer, a place where we might get some breathing room and perspective?  What if we worked with another person or a group of people in counseling, recovery or spiritual direction to assess the validity of our self-image?  What if we took risks and made daily decisions that challenged the mental concept of ourselves?  We, who are “made in the image of God” (Gen 1:28), would begin to again taste the freedom of living as children of God (cf. Rom 8:21), gradually remembering that there is one and only one authentic self-image, Jesus (Col 1:15), who desires to expose all of the posers and take his rightful place on our psychic throne.  With order restored to our souls, we shall simply spend our days in that eternal pattern of walking happily and dancing joyfully with the Lord (cf. Gen 3:8, 2 Sam 6:14).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica

June 18, 2022

“Just imagine that everyone in the audience is naked” is the advice given to many first-time public speakers.  This may sound odd initially, but there is a real spiritual logic here:  the unknown arouses fear in us; fear is a primal emotion; and it is impossible to see clearly or speak effectively when we are ruled by emotions.  The nakedness advice is thus an invitation to demand transparency in our lives, not because we want to know everybody’s secrets and business, but because we want to know where we stand with them as a starting point for a real connection and durable relationship. While there are certainly rightful occasions when we, as fragile creatures who are in-process, ought to obscure or hide our deepest self, we are nevertheless relationship-animals and must not be satisfied with a life that falls short of the radical availability and openness modeled by the crucified Christ.  Let us therefore get into the daily practice of allowing ourselves to be stripped by the circumstances of our lives (cf. Mt 27:28), of learning to long for the living God from our most vulnerable place (cf. Song 3:1), of presenting our true selves to the Lord (cf. Lk 2:22), and of being known perfectly in return (Ps 139:1).  In this way, we shall become constant prophets whose lives proclaim the truth no matter how intimidating the audience may seem (cf. Jn 18:33-40).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

BONUS RECORDING (a poem by Rumi)

June 11, 2022

In the Zen Buddhist tradition, a person goes on a very focused interior journey, sitting for hours at a time, asking deep existential questions, and striving for authentic self-understanding.  While it would be easy to dismiss such a religious practice, from a Christian point of view, as too intellectual or too self-centered, these spiritual seekers just might teach us something about what it means to be a follower of Jesus.  How many of us are really concerned about the meaning of life?  How many of us are willing to look within ourselves?  How many of us actually wrestle with the fact of suffering in the world around us?  Perhaps, indeed, we just go through the liturgical and ecclesiastical motions without ever being honest about the way we feel underneath it all.  Siddhartha lived hundreds of years before Jesus and did not claim to have any special revelations. How human he was, though, in his unwillingness to accept both pleasure and renunciation as a way of life.  Instead, he listened attentively in long periods of meditation and responded to the call to a life of integrity.  He thus became enlightened precisely by pairing the profound inner awareness of reality with compassion for and love of others (cf. Mk 12:28-31).  If only we had this kind of desire for kenosis (cf. Phil 2:7), we too might be bearers of light (cf. Jn 8:12).  Ave Crux, Spes Uncia.

June 4, 2022

There once was a man who experienced a reawakening of his religious faith.  He quit his job and traveled thousands of miles to seek spiritual counsel from a famous rabbi.  When he arrived at the rabbi’s apartment, he knocked on the door, and the rabbi answered, asking him, “Who are you?”  The man replied, “I am a spiritual seeker who has come to learn about God.”  He then looked inside the apartment and noticed how few things this famous rabbi had:  a desk, a chair, a bed, a dresser.  So the man said, “Where’s all of your stuff?”  The rabbi looked at the man’s suitcase and retorted, “Where’s all of your stuff?”  The man said, “I’m just passing through.”  The rabbi replied, “So am I.”  As disciples of Jesus, we have received a very direct vision of the meaning of life, so direct, in fact, that most of our minds cannot bear it.  Indeed, instead of living soberly in the transitoriness of this life, as we await the trial of death, we find all sorts of ways to bury our anxieties about existence so that they can hardly be felt.  Let us therefore take the words of our Lord to heart, “Do not worry about tomorrow” (Mt 6:34), and in doing so, learn how to relinquish our stuff and partner with the living God, which is nothing less than a rehearsal for eternal life.   Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

May 28, 2022

The word schizophrenia literally means “a broken mind.”  It is classified as a lifelong mental illness that a person must simply learn to endure:  the delusions of grandeur, the emotional distance, the feeling of being out-of-touch with reality, the lack of personal relationships, the anxiety about daily living, and the trouble communicating effectively.  Yet, if you ever did meet such a person, beyond the pity, you would probably feel, somewhere deep, that this was an honest human being, that this person’s brokenness was the actual nature of things, and that the only thing wrong with this person was her or his inability to hide their suffering.  Indeed, while most of us find socially acceptable ways to medicate our pain and addictions to keep ourselves together, the schizophrenic person is a living reminder that life, underneath it all, is truly perilous and that we have a desperate need for both the love of God and neighbor to remain intact (Mk 12:28-31).  Let us, therefore, look to Jesus who was himself crushed and broken (Is 53:5), but who nevertheless lived with utter integrity, especially crucified, nestled safely between the arms of his loving Father and carried along by the wings of the Spirit (Ex 19:4).  May we have the courage, with our schizophrenic sisters and brothers, to dig deep and learn to walk this same narrow path that leads to life (Mt 7:14, Gal 2:20).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

May 21, 2022

Francis of Assisi appears in gardens and front lawns around the world.  Holding a dove in one hand and a bird bath in the other, he is a symbol of good will who enjoys a unique universal appeal.  Indeed, people from all sorts of cultural and religious, or non-religious, traditions are attracted to his loving version of humanity.  Yet, do we see that beneath the gentle and sentimental exterior, there is the spiritual man, painfully aware of his capacity to sin and unapologetically dependent upon the living God.  Francis kept vigil, slept on the ground, fasted, prayed with Scripture, preached, reached out in service to the poor, and respected the authority of the Church.  His ability to connect with people and capture the imagination was thus not just some kind of natural charisma, but a firm decision, a constant commitment, to make Christ the center of his life (so much so that he bore the very wounds of Christ in his hands and feet!).  You and I would be agents of reconciliation and ambassadors of peace if we too allowed Christ, especially crucified, to be the point of reference for each and every one of our relationships (cf. Eph 2:13-22).  We would attract others like Francis if we too imaged the invisible God (Col 1:15) with bold risk-taking and unhesitating generosity.  May we become like Christ precisely by becoming like his Francis.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

May 14, 2022

I have a friend who, when she’s having a rough day, says, “I need to get down from the ladder!”  All of us probably know this ladder well – it is that interior capacity to stand above everyone else – in all of our ego-glory – or to go low and live a grounded life.  There is no in-between.  From the time we are children, indeed, the world sweeps us up to the top of the ladder (cf. Mt 4:8), and insists that it is the natural place to be.  The paparazzi blind us with their flashbulbs and the roaring crowds deafen us.  We begin to think that this is what life actually is!  Nevertheless, a still, small voice continues to whisper to us in what’s left of our hearts (1 Kings 19:12), and we, as my friend indicates, have a decision to make:  Will we take that first step of descent?  Yes, there is both spiritual paralysis and complacency to deal with, but a single decision in that moment will in fact become the seed that will bring forth a lifetime of authentic human living.  Let us, therefore, look to Jesus whose last act on earth was to go down from the ladder of the Cross into the very dirt of the earth (Jn 19:38-42), and let us, here and now, commit to only ever ascending the ladder to invite our sisters and brothers into that same low place (cf. Jn 1:51).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.  

Audrey Anastasi – The Stations of the Cross, acrylic on gold leaf canvas.

May 7, 2022

Wall of Love, you allow me to be happy, joyous and free!  You are that blessed and good darkness that constantly upholds my inner light (cf. Gen 1:3-5).  You are that thick and fruitful brush that guards the way to my inner room (cf. Gen 2:9, Mt 6:6).  You are that awful trial – the call to sacrifice my only child – that separates out all that is not the risk of faith (Gen 22:9-19).  You are that monument of trust which rises up from the waters and allows safe passage from worldliness into open spaces and new life (cf. Ex 15:19, Ps 119:45).  You are the stone tablets which discipline my heart and guide me ever into experiences of grace and truth (cf. Ex 20:20-21, Jn 1:14).  You are the bricks around my holy city, as you engineer space in me for a “land flowing with milk and honey” (Ex 3:8).  You allow my beloved to “peer through the lattices” and see me as I am (Song 2:9).  You are the wings, the shelter, the fortress, the pinions, the buckler, the shield and the refuge (Ps 91) that provide a private place for me to be with “the one whom my heart loves” (Song 3:3).  Wall of Love, you are the Cross, my only hope, and through you I shall find life.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

April 30, 2022

Have you ever been overwhelmed by the waves of life?  Calm to choppy to nerve-wracking to terrifying to absolutely unbearable, we get swept up by the waters in an instant!  Nevertheless, as our human lives unfold, we come to see that we do in fact have choices.  Maybe we begin with the macho mindset that instead of being a victim of the big wave we will take it head on.  We, of course, get crushed and must go back to the drawing board.  Perhaps we then think that we can avoid the waves altogether by diving underneath them and coming out unscathed on the other side, but we realize that the massive energy under a wave will beat us up and pull us dangerously deep underwater.  What if, instead of attacking or escaping, we tried to befriend these giant walls of water?  What if we learned to dance on their edges and move with them?  What if by riding them we could harness their power and do something beautiful with it?  May we who beg God, “Save me, for the waters have come up to my neck, and the flood sweeps over me” (Ps 69:1-2), have courage to “put out into the deep” (Lk 5:4) and discover, within those very waves, “streams of living water” (Jn 7:38) that save.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

April 23, 2022

Fertile soil makes for a fruitful soul.  When we invest time in prayer, talk with spiritual companions, find creative ways to worship God, and pay attention to that still small voice within, something beautiful happens to our inner earth.  Indeed, our soil becomes capable of nourishing life, and when we least expect it, we blossom forth from the inside out (cf. Mk 4:26-27).  The fruits we bear allow us to feed others eucharistically, while our roots testify to our deep trust in the living God and the way God chooses to sustain us from within.  In this way, we discover that our vocation truly is nothing more than the Greatest Commandment (Mk 12:28-31), where we, with Jesus, spend ourselves cultivating the relationships of this life and the next.  Let’s therefore get excited about our spiritual fertility.  Let’s make a plan to clear away the brambles, do some weeding, and listen attentively to the needs of our soil.  Let’s look forward to that moment when the miracle does in fact happen.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

April 16, 2022

“Look East!”  If the Body of Christ were a bus, this is the bumper sticker you’d see plastered to the back of the bus in bright psychedelic letters.  We are, indeed, built for that shift from worldliness to resurrected life, but how easy it is to collapse again and again into old and unhelpful patterns of living.  In the early days, candidates for reception into the Church literally stood facing the darkness, shouting their rejection of evil, but then, in an instant and with the help of the community, they made the turn eastward, to the light of a new day.  This, of course, is why the resurrection of Jesus is called “East-er.”  It is not a new idea in human history – as attested to by a certain allegory about a cave – but our celebration of these mysteries of faith should reveal to us just how urgently and passionately that eastward direction is rushing towards us in this great drama of conversion:  a loving Father constantly trying to hold us together, directing us toward a horizon that gives life, assuaging our anxieties, dealing creatively with our wounds, and offering us an enduring and meaningful alternative to the shadowlands.  Praise God for the daily work that is our resurrection and for the awesome liturgical reminders along the way.  May our hearts, indeed, have some taste of the explosion that emptied the tomb on this hallowed day.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

April 9, 2022

Alcoholics Anonymous is supported by a sound spiritual logic:  the culprit is not the alcohol, but the person’s relationship with the alcohol.  Indeed, if the problem were alcohol then the solution would simply be to cut ourselves off from it, but that is dualism, a kind of competitive “me vs. them” thinking which is not a recipe for human thriving nor a durable vision for life.  When we put the focus on our relationships with people, places and things, however, exciting possibilities open up.  We begin to see life in its uniqueness and complexity, where everything is good and fundamentally relatable (cf. Gen 1).  Even the alcoholic can appreciate the fact of alcohol, that it has been a gift to people for millennia and invites communion when used responsibly (The Church, in fact, insists on alcoholic wine at every eucharisitic liturgy!).  It should not surprise us therefore that Alcoholics Anonymous isn’t just a philosophy but a way of life that is practiced.  Members of the fellowship form communities to examine their ways of relating and take concrete steps to ensure healthy and life-giving relationships.  The next time we decide to cut another person out of our lives, avoid a place of some past trauma, or distract ourselves from painful memories, let’s join our alcoholic friends by going low, finding that God-place within, and, from that security, demanding creative ways to keep the relationship going.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

April 2, 2022

Is being “a good little boy” really a long-term vision for life?  We are trained from a very early age to follow the rules and get the reward, to follow the rules and get the reward, to follow the rules and get the reward….all the way to our coffins!  But what’s the point of that?!  Jesus invites us at the very least to be risk-takers.  He tells the story of a father who has two sons (Lk 15:11-32):  The first son is a good little boy who follows all the rules but nevertheless ends up angry and unhappy at the conclusion of the story.  The second son recognizes a desire in his heart for something more than the rules and acts on it.  And while that desire initially comes out in an unexpected and destructive way, he continues to trust in the “something more” and eventually his desire gets worked out as he becomes a new person.  Let’s identify the places in our lives where the rules have just become a socially acceptable way to mask our fears.  Let’s be honest about our desire for more and act on it.  It is there, in the clumsiness and awkwardness of it all, that we shall find ourselves worthy companions of the sinners, tax-collectors, prostitutes and thieves (Mt 21:31, Lk 23:42) who have also taken a risk on God.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

March 26, 2022

Do we actually need God?  This is a provocative question that gets to the heart of our salvation, yet false ideas abound:  Do it yourself, Pull yourself up by your bootstraps, You can do anything you put your mind to, etc.  What a sad vision for life!  Where’s the mystery?  The risk of encountering the other?  The hope of some new reality?  The trust in a power beyond ourselves?  The connection that satisfies our longing to be whole?  I am reminded of the story of a monk who goes to his abbot to learn about the spiritual life.  The abbot leads him out to the monastery lake, and, as they are talking, gradually pushes the monk’s head down into the water until he is totally submerged.  The monk, who had been thinking it was some ritual, begins to panic and just when he thinks he is going to drown, the abbot relents.  The monk bursts out of the water, gasping for breath and screaming obscenities.  The abbot calmly responds, “I’m sorry, but I want you to understand that you will never know God, until you need God like that next breath.”  Let’s stop playing God with our clever calculations and power moves, but instead learn the meaning of these words, “Your heavenly Father already knows the things you need, so do not worry about tomorrow” (Mt 6:32,34).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica. 

March 19, 2022, St. Joseph Day

TRUST GOD.  What if this whole project of being human was really about trusting God?  What if the feelings, emotions, desires and inevitable confusion in this drama were simply the circumstances for that singular act of trust that makes us whole again?  What if we do in fact have a loving parent who art in heaven who is quietly, patiently and constantly creating opportunities for us to trust?  What if our births were nothing other than a crash-course in that proverbial leap of faith into reality?  What if our deaths were the final movement of this masterpiece where we are afforded the dignity of handing ourselves over in trust?  What if everything in-between – infancy, childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, adulthood and our elder years – were the process of working out the knots that prevent us from trusting fully?  What if our neuroses, obsessions, complexes and addictions were just misguided efforts to trust?  What if God were not some kind of task-master or spiritual police officer but an intimate and humble friend who has been trying to build trust with us all along?  What if we got in the habit of closing our eyes, pausing for a moment, taking a deep breath, and paying attention to what was happening within us…and feeling what God was actually like?  Would this help us to TRUST GOD?  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

March 12, 2022

The beautiful complementarity of East and West is a stunning reminder that the cosmos has an essentially paschal character.  While the West values order, structure, logic and accuracy, the East is characterized by intuition, feeling, openness and adaptability.  Together, they image the glorious dying and rising pattern that has given existence meaning since the beginning of time:  the urgent Western need to understand the exact nature of things in the face of diminishing sunlight paired with the deep Eastern hopefulness that the darkness will in fact give way to a new reality.  It is no wonder, then, that when Christians were initiated into the early Church they faced West as they denounced a life limited to this world then literally turned East to signify the inner “East-er” they desired in their hearts.  Let’s therefore not play the game of pitting East and West against each other, but instead realize the whole symbolism.  Let’s awaken to the dimensions of East and West unfolding in our very souls.  Let’s look to Christ who lived precisely in the middle of East and West in an eternal “ministry of reconciliation” (2 Cor 5:19).  May we indeed become integrated persons grounded in the concreteness of a love that lasts.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

March 5, 2022

A border is an invisible line that is meant to distinguish one country from another.  We all know that these lines are quite arbitrary and usually drawn based on ethnicity, natural terrain or political dominance.  While grown men and women bicker, and in fact kill one another, over these borders, Jesus reminds us that there is no abiding kingdom in this world (cf. Jn 18:36) and that all conflicts are a projection of something unresolved within us (cf. Lk 17:21).  What if our true ethnic identity were as children of God?  What if the only terrain that mattered was the spiritual landscape of souls?  What if that unquenchable thirst for power was just a misdirected desire for everlasting life?  Indeed, the Cross is the ultimate boundary-marker:  God has reached out to the absolute limits of existence, has established the definitive distinction between this life and the next, and to this day invites people to cross over into a place of trust and love.  Let’s therefore be relentless in finding that deep interior borderline in ourselves.  Let’s challenge one another to make the turn from defending the false self to a life of vulnerability and openness to others.  Let’s link arms with each of our sisters and brothers on the way to our radically inclusive homeland.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

February 26, 2022

I was once riding in the back of a city bus that stopped at a grocery store.  An elderly woman exited the bus, but did not go inside.  She just stood there, on the curb, weeping.  The bus driver, who was just about to pull away from the bus stop, shifted into park, opened the door, exited the bus, then hugged and consoled the woman for about a minute.  He eventually returned to the driver’s seat and we pulled away.  I overheard someone say that the woman’s husband had just recently died.  How often do we turn a blind eye to suffering because it makes us feel uncomfortable?  How often do we hesitate to take a risk on authentic ministry because a situation does not fit into our neat understanding of life?  How often do we rationalize away an opportunity to genuinely reach out in service to our sisters and brothers?  It is precisely that false feeling of safety that will make us spiritual zombies whose rituals and religious words are hollow.  Let us therefore have the guts, this coming week, and in the months and years ahead, to actually pull our buses off to the side of the road (Lk 10:34) and meet the Christ whom we have been claiming to seek after all along (cf. Mt. 25:44-45).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica. 

Lord Jesus, you are the eternal Son of God who lives a life, even to this day, of radical trust.  Indeed, you spend your days, nights and weekends trusting and trusting and trusting the living God whom you have known and depended upon since the beginning of time.  Lead me to that low place.  Teach me how to be simple.  Help me to walk the path that leads to authenticity, freedom and life.  May you be the Word who touches my heart and causes me to keep my own word and say what I mean when interacting with other people.  May you be the High Priest who models perfect priesthood for me that I may make my life a continual sacrifice to God on behalf of all of my sisters and brothers.  May you be the Eucharist that heals my wounds and makes me capable of nourishing others with my thoughts, words, actions and presence. I love you, and I invite you ever more deeply into my heart that we, together, may take a risk on and experience the intimacy of being Beloved.  Ave Crux, Spes Unica.

February 12, 2022

Do you remember your first kiss?  What power!  What fire!  The brain seems to store the memory of such a primal connection at a place too deep for words.  An equally common human experience, however, is the dissatisfaction we feel when that graced moment comes to an end, the passion fades, and two people return to the hard fact of their separateness (cf. Song 5:5-6).  In the Christian life, it seems that we are constantly in search of a kiss that lasts, but do we look to the God who made all things by his cosmic kiss in the beginning (cf. Gen 1:1)?  Do we really and truly seek the “kisses of his mouth” (Song 1:2) in our life of prayer?  Do we admit that we too have betrayed the Lord (cf. Mt 26:49) by the things we have done with our lips?  Indeed, we must learn to make every syllable that rolls off of our tongue, every bite of food, every smile, and every breath we take the kiss that puts us in touch with the infinite.  In doing so, we shall become attached to our Beloved in some durable way that takes away our separation anxiety and expands our hearts for love (cf. Ps 119:32).  Ave Crux, Spes Unica!

SOME KISS by Rumi (Translated by Coleman Barks)

Holy Cross Brother and Priest Civil War Veterans 

In 1910, there were eight Brothers living in the Community House (now Columba Hall) who were veterans of the War Between the States.  Each had seen his share, and more, of combat: one had fought on both sides of the war and had been held as a prisoner of war; one heard at the onset of a battle, a voice that declared, “You will die today;” another was to become well known as a contributor to the science of apiary studies; another would become the lab assistant to Father John Zahm, CSC in the new (1906) Science Hall. Three others were so self-effacing that little is known about their forty-plus years as Holy Cross Brothers. 

Included in the photo of these very proud and stately men are those seated in the first row: Brother Leander (James) McLain, Father William Olmstead (a diocesan priest), Father William Corby, Father Peter Cooney and Brother John Chrysostom (Mark) Will.  Standing in the second row are Brother Benedict (Conrad) Mantele, Brother Ignatius (Ignatz) Mayer, General William Hayes, Brother Raphael (James) Maloy, Brother Cosmos (Nicholas) Bath and Brother Eustachius (John) McInerny.  An eighth veteran is Brother Agatho (William) Parle, who was living at the time but is not pictured. 

Each Brother-warrior brought to Holy Cross gifts, not because of his Civil War service, but in spite of it.  For a few, the gifts given by these men to Father Sorin were quite grand; for others quite pedestrian.  Regardless, for each of these grand old gentlemen, his photo radiates with a determination in the eyes that provided him with the ability to be a loyal, victorious citizen of this world, and eventually a very worthy citizen of Heaven. Ave Crux Spes Unica!